You’ve all seen them
The online dating profiles that someone just THREW UP in, oh, like, mmm an instant with no forethought this afternoon.
The dreadful photo.
They are gawking.
Showing the most awkward moment of their smile.
Or yes, wait, my personal favorite, mostly men (guyz? WHAT were you thinking? your other, yes still single buds told you this was ok. They were wrong), the cell phone photo of you posing in front of the bathroom mirror…. [2019 Update: The term selfies has come into use since I first wrote this. So you would think with the advent of self-taking digital device technology you wouldn’t be seeing the bathroom mirror photos anymore. But, alas, alack, those days are not yet behind us and may never be.]
The women’s whose text whines about men…
Oh my WORD!
Didn’t you do any forethought? Didn’t you think about what you were doing first?
Well, no actually, clearly not.
*sigh*
OK
Let me help you out here.
You will actually need to do a little preparation before you barf up a internet dating profile this afternoon, or seriously folks, it will be just dreadful. “If you think I’m cute, hit me up,” is NOT a profile description that is going to garner a lot of female interest, guys.
Your profile essay should run about 3-5 paragraphs. Longer than that and appear desperate. Shorter than that and you will receive few responses unless you are Angelina Jolie.
This afternoon, or even better on a Sunday or Monday afternoon which is a great time to publish your profile, start gathering information about yourself to include some reflection of this in your profile:
Some things to consider…..
(get out a sheet of paper, start writing…)
Marital Status
Single Never Married
Divorced
Separated
Widowed
You job
Career
Body Type
Children – yes, you will need to contemplate this
have them
how many
ages
do you want more
had enough?
Willing to date someone with children?
or not?
Hobbies?
how do you spend your time?
Don’t just say you hike…
Tell me you love to hike Mt. Charleston or Angel Island
OK, doing that list and preparing at least a little will help!
I will discuss the ALL important Internet Dating Profile MAIN PROFILE PHOTO tomorrow.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Steve Chambers says
September 30, 2009 at 9:59 PMThis is great advice. A little preparation…a spin here, a spin there and we can present the exact image we want to present.
Steve Chambers, B2B Sale Trainer
Kate McKeon says
September 30, 2009 at 11:15 PMExcellent advice. What seems so common sense is anything but! Thank you for educating!
Kate
Katie says
September 30, 2009 at 10:30 PMBarfing up your profile . . . LOL
The “if you think I’m cute, hit me up….” reminds me of a time when fella walked up to me at an outdoor concert and said,
“I’m cute, you’re hot, let’s go f–k.”
Um, yeah . . . thanks? He stands out in my mind but that conversation didn’t get him anywhere. Just like these profiles, did he really think it would?
Katie
Rob Northrup says
September 30, 2009 at 10:51 PMHard to follow up Katie’s mental image at the rock concert, but someone has to…
(hey it probably works once in a while)
April’s advice is right. As with most things we need to think about what our market wants to hear. And they don’t want to hear about us except as it relates to them…
Seize the Day,
Rob
Keri Eagan says
October 1, 2009 at 12:43 AMYup. I once wrote a profile for a dating site. Once. And only because a freind of mine was really into internet dating and waived a Dr Phil book in front of me saying it would be good fun. I didn’t have advice like this, so up went the profile. My freind went to read it (it wasn’t up very long) and said it was fine, but I’d used the word “stuff” about eight or nine times on the page.
Keri Eagan
John Ho says
October 1, 2009 at 5:45 AMA little planning & preparation ahead means more likley smooth (or at least less rough) sailing ahead.
To thsoe who over prepare and over plan, then the word of advice would be:
Do NOT wait for the “prefect” moment as there’s none and you just waste your precious time thru’ procrastination.
John Ho
Lynn Lane says
October 1, 2009 at 7:06 AMApril,
I think you have it all covered. I have no doubt this prep work and though will get you a great looking , informative profile that will work.
Lynn Lane
Success Strategies For Life
Martin O'Connor says
October 1, 2009 at 6:43 AMThis reminds me of a story about Vince Lombardi. As I heard it he would start the first session of training camp each year with the words “Gentlemen, this is a football.”
The point was Lombardi believed in the basics, and that approach seemed to work for him and The Packers.
We shouldn’t get away from the basics in anything.
Looking forward to the next post to get some tips on taking pictures for small places like avatars, which I need to do.
Martin O’Connor
Anthony Lemme says
October 1, 2009 at 7:15 AMYou would think that people would put a little more care and effort into such a thing but apparently not…
Anthony
Lisa says
October 1, 2009 at 9:20 AMI have a friend who met her soon to be fiance on an onlone dating service. I’m curious to see how they both presented themselves on their profile. She had told me that her search was a lot easier than she expected.
MissMentor
Mister P says
October 1, 2009 at 11:08 AMIt always pays to put thought into things. Especially something that represents you to people and gives them a first impression.
Good advice April
Bert (alter ego- Mister P)
Lisa McLellan says
October 1, 2009 at 12:25 PMOh yes Dating Diva, do help those poor souls out there that have so much to offer, yet are completely unable to advertise it appropriately.
I loved your examples!
Lisa McLellan
Child Care Expert,
Babysitting Services, Babysitting Tips, Babysitters, Nannies
Darryl Pace says
October 1, 2009 at 12:54 PMExcellent info for the singles out there looking to make a good impression via the web.
Health, Fitness for Working People — Darryl Pace
Martin says
October 1, 2009 at 2:38 PMPerhaps a sales letter approach would work:
– “Finally Revealed…Your Ideal Soul Mate”!
– “1 Big Reason Why I’m Your Ideal Man”!!
– “Discover The Inside Secrets That Will Blow You Away”!!!
Maybe not!
April Braswell says
October 1, 2009 at 5:04 PMHi Martin!
thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting! 🙂
Just we will have NO! blowing going on in my posts, ok? 😉
that would not be polished and poised, n’est pas?
April
Jennifer Battaglino says
October 1, 2009 at 7:10 PMYou make me happy that I don’t have to think that hard anymore. Fries my brain to easily.
As usual, great advice. And great interview today!
Jen B
PS – my email down so I will text you in the morn
The Harwood Center – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety
Greg says
October 1, 2009 at 8:20 PMI don’t know April, it sounds like a lot of work. Can’t I just pay to hire and expert to write it for me?
April Braswell says
October 1, 2009 at 10:36 PMHi Greg,
indeed writing your profile for you is part of the package of services I provide as a coach. For some men who want to delegate more because of their super busy executive lives, I offer prestige level matchmaking services as well. Many of singles want an expert to do that for them, indeed.
April
Pam Schulz says
October 1, 2009 at 10:15 PMWow – what a list! Looks like the Dating and Relationship Coach has it covered!
Pam
Jose Escalante says
October 1, 2009 at 11:41 PMI find it interesting to see how marketing principles apply. Plus “the cell phone photo of you posing in front of the bathroom mirror….” is hilarious.
Jose Escalante