If You’re Looking for Love via Online Dating Sites and Apps, Do Set Up an Additional Personal Email to Secure Privacy and Safety
One of the things I recommend during online dating workshops and singles conferences as well as my dating and relationship coaching sessions to singles who are doing any kind of online dating is to set up a secondary personal email address.
You might not immediately think to do this because so many sites have their own email boxes for you to use.
But invariably at some point, you will be giving your new dates your email address.
1. You want it to be different than your personal normal one to keep things separate and private.
2. You want it to be different than the one you use at ANY Social Networking/Social Media Sites.
The reason for this is, you do NOT want a stranger, near stranger to have your email address in their email address contacts book so that when they pull in their address book at the Social Networking Sites, they connect to you or can see your whole life online before you choose to share that level of your whole life with a stranger.
Facebook. Twitter. LinkedIn. Instagram. Plaxo. All of them.
All the Social Networking sites have a step where you connect and can pull in your whole email address book.
Your photo albums. Your family. Your high school. College and University Alma Maters. Employer. Corporate ownership. And more.
There are a number of books out about Managing Your Brand or Identity Online from a marketing perspective. This is about from a Privacy, Safety, and Security perspective.
Now, it’s not about the being paranoid that each will become a stalker.
This is about keeping things a little mysterious and building the romantic acquaintanceship over time. Which is more intriguing, fascinating, arousing, and stimulating.
Sure, eventually you’ll share that level of acquaintanceship with your date, but only once you two have been on several dates and you’ve decided you want to consider becoming a couple and pursue a relationship together, not just a first or second date.
Dating is the process of becoming acquainted with each other and honing those relationship skills. Trying to get their full name to do an online search to get someone’s background before you’ve even met is impertinent. Until you two have vetted for in person chemistry, it is unnecessary.
On the other hand, someone who wants to meet you for a glass of wine and a shared cheese platter has no right to expect you share sufficient information for that person to do a full online background check.
Think of the sizzling chemistry between Henry Fonda and Barbara Stanwyck when he helps her put on a shoe in the movie, “The Lady Eve.” They don’t even kiss. But the super sexy chemistry sparks fly. Keep a little mystery!
And establish the habit in all things big and small to be maintaining your privacy and establishing safety and security.
By creating and using a secondary personal email address with all things Online Dating, you can avoid a stranger you will date (vs. just a Facebook Friend) knowing EVERYTHING about you…. before you’ve even met!
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
———————————————————————-
Internet Dating and Relationship Expert
as seen in “Dating for Dummies” 3rd Edition
Click here to apply to apply to have April write your professionally written internet dating profile.
Internet Dating Profile Writing and Review
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John Ho says
September 23, 2009 at 11:43 PMApril,
Great advice as even though on-line dating sound romantic and adventureous, it’s better safe than sorry.
I understand that you also tell your client to meet the other party face to face rather than just “chatting on line.”
By looking into one’s birthdates / birthday via numerology, one can saves a fair bit of time too!
John Ho
Rob says
September 24, 2009 at 4:39 AMlike…
sexytequilashoote r@yahoo.com or
allnightlong@hotmail .com
seriously, great advice…
Seize the Day,
Rob
Lynn Lane says
September 24, 2009 at 6:19 AMApril,
“Keep a little mystery! ” Stay safe! Great habit to maintain. Thanks.
Lynn Lane
http://www.Warriorofsuccess.com
Steve Chambers says
September 24, 2009 at 6:30 AMVery, very good idea. There are lots of tricks and smart tips to smart online dating and you know them all.
Steve Chambers, B2B Sale Trainer
April Braswell says
September 24, 2009 at 12:55 PMHi Lynn,
thank so much for stopping by adding your comments at my blog!
yes indeedity do
safety is of paramount concern
April
April Braswell says
September 24, 2009 at 12:56 PMThanks for saying so, Steve. Tips, Tricks, and Play Safe! that’s my motto!
April
April Braswell says
September 24, 2009 at 12:58 PMHi John,
you are such a stellar Numerology expert.
Indeed, knowing one’s numerology can be a great addition
however, asking for a stranger’s birthdate before we are safely acquainted
would be too much too soon
once acquainted
then singles can delve deeper for Relationship compatibility.
thanks so much for stopping by and commenting at my blog
April
Martin says
September 24, 2009 at 1:07 PMGood, sensible advice.
Now what’s your REAL email address?!!
Greg says
September 24, 2009 at 1:09 PMThis is a site worth subscribing to! Thanks April!
Robert Martin says
September 24, 2009 at 4:28 PMOnline dating and safety go hand in hand. Great info.
Robert Martin
Jennifer Battaglino says
September 24, 2009 at 7:44 PMHeck yeah! My goodness I hope people do this. You would like to think most people are good people but that still leaves the leftovers to worry about. Definitely keep it separate until you have a real level of trust.
Great advice. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn how many people haven’t thought of this. Good thing you’re out there.
Jen B
The Harwood Center – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety
James Mason says
September 24, 2009 at 8:29 PMThis is a good reminder for everyone.
Some people wouldn’t even think about setting up a different email address.
Thanks,
James Mason
BusinessAndMarketingMakeover.com/blog
Jose Escalante says
September 24, 2009 at 10:38 PMlol Rob is hilarious
Jose Escalante
Mister P says
September 24, 2009 at 11:15 PMGood safety tips!
Do you advocate background checks before dating?
Bert (alter ego- Mister P)
Keri Eagan says
September 25, 2009 at 2:59 AMPutting in the bit about keeping a little mystery made the whole piece seem playful and light even though it is a serious issue.
Thanks so much for putting in the seperate email info. I had no idea someone could track my life like that. I’ve just joined facebook, twitter, and …. squidoo in the last week. Haven’t filled in anything yet – blank mind – so your advice is timely.
Cheers.
Keri Eagan
Katie says
September 25, 2009 at 4:45 PMSecondary email is key! You don’t want to mix friends with maybe dates. There are just too many ways private information can be exposed now. I feel naked!
, Katie
Kate McKeon says
September 25, 2009 at 6:41 PMSuper important to keep it separate from your professional email. Imagine the delight of having your entire professional career discovered and dissected before your first date all because the fella found your LinkedIn profile. Not cool. Takes it from date to interview. Yuck.
Pushing companies from good to great, Kate
April Braswell says
September 25, 2009 at 7:41 PMHi Kate,
thanks for stopping by and commenting. Oh my word, EXACTLY. Buy me a coffee or martini first, ok? 😉 Then can we talk Hockey, already?
April
Lisa McLellan says
September 25, 2009 at 9:34 PMGreat point. At least there are many places where you can get a free email address so singles should definitely do this.
Lisa McLellan
Babysitting Tips, Babysitting Services – Babysitters, Nannies, and Au-pairs