Continuing my internet dating expert coverage of using SKYPE in conjunction with your online dating endeavors, before I address when using SKYPE is advisable, I’m first going to cover when NOT to SKYPE dating.
Reason Not to SKYPE Date #1: Instead of Meet Nearby
With the massive growth of internet dating sites where just about anyone who is single has a dating profile, not everyone who has posted an online dating profile is interested in a serious long-term relationship. Some of them are just sort of testing the waters
Like “if YOU’re interested in me, great. You pursue me. Hit me up. And YOU do all the work.” It’s that pillow-princess approach whether the single is male or female. No-one wants to be left doing 100% of the heavy lifting. (Kevin Hogan in his Reading Body Language Mastery course)
Reason Not to SKYPE Date #1: Because You Are Always Too Busy to Meet
When you live within a reasonable drive of each other (and that varies by metro area and traffic patterns), then using SKYPE in lieu of meeting your prospective date offline in person for a date is just plan lazy. Or else it is a sign that right now you are just too busy for a relationship. It happens. Be honest with yourself. And if that is always the case in your life, then you might need to do a little heal your heart work examining any wounds still around from prior relationships.
Lastly, if you two are thinking to use SKYPE as an additional way to filter a prospective date out before meeting them so you don’t “waste” an hour meeting for a glass of wine on a work night, SKYPE won’t necessarily do that for you.
Also, it sends the message from guys to women that essentially he is too cheap to buy you a glass of Napa Valley Merlot but you still have to go to all the time, trouble, expense and effort to look your best just to be in front of your webcam.
Guys typically don’t realize to think this through. That the women still have all the responsibility and effort of an offline date while he has just about none. Women don’t feel good about that. So, if you push for a SKYPE date before meeting, and she’s trepidatious about jeopardizing herself online with a complete stranger like that. Then she may simply bow out completely and not meet you. And really what it was about was not that she wasn’t interested in you. It was out of safety, security, and wanting the man to make a little bit of an effort.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
———————————————————————-
Internet Dating and Relationship Expert
as seen in “Dating for Dummies” 3rd Edition
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Neil Dhawan says
May 1, 2011 at 7:10 PMOkay, I can see using Skype if “meeting” someone at a distance … a LONG distance. But, other than that, as you pointed out, just seems lazy. Love your KH cite about the “heavy lifting” … most people just don’t want to lift at all! What I found most interesting in this article is you noting that if someone is “always too busy” that one needs to examine things on a deeper level and maybe do some “heart work”.
Best, Neil
http://geneflora.com/smile/
Dewayne Chriswell says
May 1, 2011 at 7:24 PMOne less thing to worry about conquering for the time being. Now if I could just get this Twitter thing down…
Dewayne Chriswell
http://dewaynechriswell.com
Expert Sales training says
May 1, 2011 at 8:38 PMApril, Thanks for another article of expert dating advice about how to not use skype for a date and stay safe.
Scott Sylvan Bell
Increase your sales now
Now go implement!
Sonya Lenzo says
May 1, 2011 at 9:17 PMApril,
Also using Skype, you don’t get the advantage of being able to use Being Able to Read Language on the whole body!
Sonya Lenzo
John moulder says
May 2, 2011 at 3:02 AMGosh . One has to be so carefull with these new fangled ways to connect with another person .
Alex says
May 2, 2011 at 3:50 AMInteresting article. I can’t see that many people would use Skype as a dating tool if they live within the same general metro area. If there’s a great distance involved, as one of your previous commenters noted, then, sure, I would see Skype being a viable approach.
Interesting piece.
Thanks.
Trisha Chambers says
May 2, 2011 at 8:19 AMUsing Skype to date….now that’s interesting!
Reading Body Language says
May 2, 2011 at 12:19 PMIt’s amazing how things are changing in the dating world since I was there originally as a single.
Kevin Bettencourt says
May 2, 2011 at 3:57 PMI don’t see how Skype would allow for true chemistry.
Eva Palmer Hipnosis para dejar de fumar says
May 2, 2011 at 4:51 PMI use skype a lot from continent to continent, but always with my friends! don’t know if I would share that with strangers!
Clare Delaney says
May 2, 2011 at 10:06 PMInteresting thoughts on SKYPE and dating, valid point about it possibly being lazy, I hadn’t thought about that!
Clare
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Michael D Walker says
May 3, 2011 at 11:03 PMGood considerations for not using Skype before meeting someone offline.
Michael