There is a Success Mentality tip that circulates about “Keeping the End in Mind.” Well, if only online dating singles would remember to do more of this when it comes to emailing, texting, and phoning in the navigation to the First Date.
When you are about to send a text message over to your Prospective Date, do keep the end in mind and ask yourself, “WHY am I sending a text message?” Reflect on the answer to that question first before you send the text.
It’s not only about age because I have heard and encountered this from Millennials Generation 20 something singles through to people in their 60s (albeit, less so in the after 50 years old dating crowd) the habit of Text Dating.
A number of singles have apparently forgotten the whole premise of why they would want to go on a date.
Going on a date is to enjoy all the full sensory connection of BEING with another person, sharing an activity or two with them, and getting to know them better.
Texting can provide some of that. Really it can. HOWEVER, it cannot serve as a substitute for those In Person dates.
So to aim to chatski significantly with someone who lives within a reasonable drive of you where the two of you have agreed you want to meet for a date is…
- Lazy
- Annoying
- Socially Immature
I say socially immature because it misses the mark of being considerate to the needs of the other person – you’re interrupting their day looking to “hang” together via texting.
Textetiquette Good Reasons for Singles to Text Before the First Date:
When can you text each other WITH PURPOSE?
What are some appropriate reasons to actually text each other?
- To confirm what time this evening after work that you two will talk by phone. “I’ll phone at 7 pm, will that be ok for you?” “7:15 would better.” “OK, I’ll phone then.”
- To confirm that you’ll see each other tonight at XYZ Restaurant and what color you’re wearing. “Looking forward to meeting you tonight. See you at 7:oo at The Four Seasons. I’ve got a red dress on.”
- To advise your date that you’re running a few minutes late. “There’s an accident on the 101. I’ll be there by 7:15.”
- To inform your date that you’ve arrived and are looking for them. “I just go here. I’m over at the bar. Where are you?”
Pretty much anything other than that and you want to either pick up the phone or simply wait until the First Date!
When you remember to wait and Text with Purpose only you will refrain from jeopardizing actually getting to meet your Prospective Date and enjoy the journey to romance of Online Dating!
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Dating and Relationship Expert
Internet Dating and Relationship Expert
as seen in “Dating for Dummies” 3rd Edition
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Persuasive selling skills says
May 19, 2011 at 9:29 PMAt some point you have to close the deal, get a date or get out. There is nothing worse than 2 people staring at eachother with no point.
Scott Sylvan Bell
Persuasive selling skills
Now go implement!
Clare Delaney says
May 20, 2011 at 12:17 AMMore good advice April, that “Keeping the End in Mind” is important in Textetiquette too!
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Covert Conversational Hypnosis says
May 20, 2011 at 2:58 AMThe concept of confirmation is pretty crucial. This advice
carries over to every aspect of life.
Excellent advice as always.
Trisha Chambers says
May 20, 2011 at 6:15 AMYou got this one right! Great Post about texting and talking!
Dewayne Chriswell says
May 20, 2011 at 6:22 AMTexting, conversation, on the phone… This is a good one that transitions well across the board.
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Sonya Lenzo says
May 20, 2011 at 7:52 AMYES! I always think this is so OBVIOUS….phone calls too, at least at the beginning, are for exchanging information….and there IS and etiquette involved. Glad you are raising that point!
Sonya Lenzo
Kevin Bettencourt says
May 20, 2011 at 11:51 AMHi April, I was wondering if you thought that the advances in technology have actually slowed down the human need for interaction? I think it could go either way. On one hand if a person goes the Dating sight, email, text, phone, meet route; it narrows the search so by the time you meet you probably have a strong candidate. On the other hand, spontaneity is somewhat removed which might diminish a spark. What do you think?
Eva Palmer says
May 20, 2011 at 12:42 PMI agree with you April!!!
So many people forget why they are dating someone and they do the same with their texts! They will just text to text…and that can be very annoying!
Reading Body Language says
May 20, 2011 at 3:14 PMYour detailed guidance is so great April it will definitely help other single avoid costly relationship mistakes.
John Moulder says
May 20, 2011 at 4:20 PMAnother informative post April . Very tricky business , this dating game .
Neil Dhawan says
May 22, 2011 at 3:58 PMThat’s just great advice for everything in life … have a purpose for doing “whatever” in every area of life … work, dating, cooking, cleaning and even relaxing … Plus, as I understand, having “purpose in life” is a very attractive quality 🙂
Bryan says
May 22, 2011 at 5:40 PMI like to begin with the end in mind…people also need to think how this text looks …we can’t convey tone or expressions in a text…
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Susan says
June 13, 2011 at 5:28 AMThe ones who text “good morning” when I’m at work. Do they want to get me fired? It just seems like they’re jerks when they do that. Where are the real guys looking for a long term relationship? How do I find them?