Midlife Dating Advice: 3 Smooth, Suave, and Sophisticated Dating Tips for Younger Men Wanting to Date Older Cougar Women
Used to be 20 years ago that for a young man to be interested in an older woman, people thought he must be “hard up.” Nowadays, there is still some residual judgement and bias where people think and whisper to each other, “Well, you know, he must be after only one thing.”
But the truth is one of the hottest current trends in dating is Cougar Dating wherein younger men are pursuing older women.
If you’re a younger man and you are attracted to the confidence, maturity, and fun of an older woman, here are 3 smooth, suave, and sophisticated dating tips for you to attract, pursue, and date older women.
Cougar Dating Tip #1. Do Be Smooth: Go Where The Fish Are
Where do older women congregate? Are older women really at the same singles bars as the 20 something girls? In some cases, yes, they are. In Silicon Valley, Los Angeles, and Manhattan, you will find the sexy successful business executive women rubbing elbows while downing the Chardonnay, Mojitos, Cosmos, or Margaritas together with the 20 somethings just out of college. And while singles bars are fun, they really can be a mad house.
Where else could you try? When you want to stand out and not be one of many other single men in the crowd, go to the gym or YMCA classes that women love and attend en masse. There are always more women in the group classes at the gym because studies demonstrate that women are very tribal and socializers. Take a yoga class.
Cougar Dating Tip #2. Do Be Suave: Do Move In When You First Meet and Be Low Key
Now the thing is, while it is a hot new dating trend for younger men to date older women, frankly, not every 40+ year old is thinking that way. You might need to woo her a little bit about the idea. Be a man and do approach her. She will respect your masculinity for this. However, be a bit more covert. Be low key in your exchange, and her defenses will go down.
At the end of the class just warmly strike up conversations with the other women. Be smooth and suave here. Just strike up a conversation. Don’t immediately push to get her phone number. Just say at the end, “I’ve really enjoyed talking with you. I hope to see you next week. I’ll definitely be back again.”
Cougar Dating Tip #3. Do Be Sophisticated: Invite Her Out with You at Your Second Meeting
At your second conversation, she will be more comfortable with you. That’s when you could suggest, “Hey, I haven’t had my coffee yet, and gotta get some java. Would you like to join me for a cup of coffee around the corner before you head out?”
You show your confident sophistication knowing that she is busy. It’s also a compliment. “You’re beautiful. You’re successful. You must be busy.”
By doing that, subtly and smoothly you just let her know it would be brief. No pressure for too much of anything right away. You’re just looking to get to know her a bit better in a romantic way. She will feel more comfortable with you this way which increases your chances of romantic pursuit success your with dating older women.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Las Vegas Boomer Over 40 After 50 Dating Expert
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mattam says
January 10, 2011 at 5:06 AMi think older women are more confident sexy and know what they want then young women do
Maggy says
February 27, 2011 at 6:14 AMHi April. I agree. It’s kewl for older women to date younger men. As a feminist if men can then women should too. What do you think are the best places to meet younger hot guys?
Rob Miller says
March 10, 2011 at 12:42 AMI feel ok about a dating a woman a few years older than me but not a lot older. That still just feels weird.
Chris Petrello says
March 19, 2011 at 3:59 PMLovely just what I was searching for to do better with older woman. Thanks April.
Sylvia says
March 23, 2011 at 9:52 PMI ACTUALLY don’t agree with you totally April. I think it sounds good on paper younger men with older women. But I just don’t think it works outside of Hollywood. Just look at Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. They didn’t make it work.
Kurt says
May 1, 2012 at 3:06 AMOne of my friends has a thing for women 20+ years older. When he was in he early 20s I witnessed him hitting on a just such a cougar who was in her late 40s and he went down in flames! He learned that when approaching an older woman he shouldn’t refer to her as “Madam” as in “Excuse me, madam…”