How to Date Better Dating Over 50: Stretch Your Geographic Market Reach

When you are a Single Boomer looking for a life partner or to get married over 50, it can be a challenge to meet OTHER singles over 50.  I especially hear this from single Boomers who are in smaller towns or smaller metro areas.  Quite often I hear some variation on the theme of, “I’ve met them all.”

I’m laughing because to some extent, I understand. I used to belong to small ish Christian church on the San Francisco peninsula. I used to joke that there were TWO single Christian men in my church (yes, talk about slim pickin’s!) …. and ONE of them was my BROTHER! (now happily married, thank you to all who wished him well via my blog, twitter account, and email.  He and his bride are doing great.)

So, I’ve walked a little in those pair of pumps.

If you are feeling like, “I have met them ALL” of the adult single in your desired demographic, then the first thing I suggest to my online dating coaching clients is what you want to do next is Stretch Your Geographic Market Reach. You want to move your search out from a 20-30 minute radius of where you live to something more like within about 90 minutes.

Doing so serves two purposes.

1. It really does stretch and increase your potential dating pool all within a reasonable drive from where you live.
2. Actually doing this also stretches your mind and suggests a new and enhanced perspective to your unconscious mind and your RAS Reticular Activating System. It stretches your mental filter literally to see and perceive differently. Integrating that into your dating process means you will also notice and perceive in an enhance and improved way the “tired soil” dating field right where you are. Your refreshed mindset will now, just happenstance, mind you, while you’re going about your daily activities and shopping errands, enable you notice that attractive midlife singleton in the waiting area for your latte over where you add the sugar and milk. While you’re there, smile and break the ice!

Let’s take the San Francisco Bay Area as a physical example. You’re an attractive single lady in her 50s or so and live in San Francisco. Include searching for single men over 50 as far north as Sacramento and as far south as Gilroy.

You can cite a broader search range in your online dating profile at: Match.com, Yahoo! Personals (Note: No longer) and LavaLife and most of the better premium dating sites and now apps.

Also remember, when you’re looking for love at midlife that you absolutely do want to use the internet dating sites. Same thing for anyone younger, too, while we’re at it. Just really do also incorporate offline activities where you’ll socializing face-to-face. While there are now after May 2011 with the Match Group launching OurTime, there are superb online dating sites and apps particularly geared for singles over 50 to date and find love without feeling like you’re hanging out in a 20s single bar with your children watching you. Combining activities to meet mature singles both on the net and offline in daily life, like any good marketing plan includes multiple tactics into a cohesive strategy, increases both your likelihood to find love at midlife and develop your relationship skills sufficiently to nourish that relationship for a lifetime of love and romance.

And if that’s what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place!

I both found love at midlife and married at 36. But after walking alongside my husband and his ordeal with cancer, he passed, and I was tossed back out into the singles scene, dating again and seeking a marriage relationship in my 40s. I have found lasting love twice in a lifetime and can help you do the same, if that is something you truly want. We all have at least a little personal growth work to do to create true and lasting intimacy. Combine that with the dating strategy I provide and implement them, and you’ll be meeting new quality singles and dating better in no time.

Happy Dating and Relationships!

April Braswell

Marriage Minded Singles Dating and Relationship Coach