Alicia Muñoz, LPC’s first book, No More Fighting, the title is almost a misnomer. From that title, you might assume this book is all about helping couples who are having rock ’em sock ’em verbally yelling and screaming at each other therapy.
If upon reading the book’s title you had those sort of thoughts, too, you would be wrong as was I when I first read about this book.
Instead, what his wonderful book has about 255 page of a full litany of Romantic Couple Relationship issues each well addressed, complete with a weekly 20 minutes exercise for the two of you to do together. There are 52 chapters, each of which is about 3-4 pages of wisdom, additional resources for going more deeply into that topic, and an exercise for couples to do together. While this couple’s book is from everything I have read targets heterosexual couples, LGBTQ couples could easily apply pretty much all of the lessons and exercises as well. The case study examples cite heterosexual couples for the examples.
The Section themes, each of which are covered by 2-3 chapters, address almost every kind of issue couples will have to face or discuss at some point in their life long relationship:
Self-Care
Communication
Your Partner’s World
Intimacy Issues
Taking Responsibility
Love Rituals
Self-Esteem
Life Philosophy
Social Styles
Attachment Issues
Power and Control
Ruptures
The Art of Repair
Money Matters
Coping with Stress
Parenting
Love Languages
Sexuality
Relationship Wreckers
Monogamy and Beyond
General Inspiration
Resources and References and Online Articles and Websites each offer a great selection of more books to read to cover some of the topics more in depth.
Ms Muñoz provides a wonderful resource book essential for every married couple’s personal library. Despite the title leading the casual glancer to presuppose this is only a couples’ counseling guide for couples deeply enmeshed in an argumentative dynamic, it really takes a very positive and proactive approach to building communication and intimacy for every couple. You could wisely give this as a Holiday present, anniversary gift, wedding present, or Valentine’s Day gift to every couple you know. The title makes it sound critical to give it. But that is not the warm and positive tone of the book whatsoever.
Every therapist and counseling center would be wise to add this to their Reading Area and Resource Center. Every Pre Marital Faith Based Counselor – Pastor, Priest, Rabbi – would be well served to own it, read it, reference it, and recommend it to every newly engaged couple to equip them well for a strong marriage.
As a Dating and Relationship Coach and Counselor to individuals and couples, I was delighted to find Ms. Muñoz referenced the stalwarts of Relationship studies, John Gottman aka (truly) the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert and the Gottman Institute’s work, John Chapman’s Love Languages, and Harville Hendrix’s IMAGO and Getting the Love You Want. The additional resources and bibliography are additionally rewarding to add to your reading list if you have not done so already.
I highly recommend this book to any couples seeking greater love and intimacy and those who counsel and serve them.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
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