Integrity in Dating: Online Dating Profile Photograph Advice PT1

Singles looking for love online will sometimes feel that they are not good enough looking to attract a boyfriend or girlfriend. What is worse is if they feel they are no longer good enough looking to attract a serious relationship at an internet dating site.

When that is the case, what do these discouraged singles do?

Lying With Your Photo At Your Internet Dating Profile Scenario 1: Someone Else

Internet Dating Profile Writer Photos Advice Tips
Online Dating Photo

Some singles have actually posted photographs of other singles in their Online Dating Profile.  I actually have heard about this from both sides of the equation.  Single women email me with their tales of woe.  They relate these long detailed stories of having posted a profile online.  They had just posted a profile kind of as a lark.  They just wanted to look around and poke around and see what and who was there.

And wouldn’t you know it?  This always happens.  She would find herself starting to email with a cute guy at the dating site.  They would email for awhile.  And then she and he would start to develop feelings for each other.  Now she emails with questions about what should she do now?  What can she possibly do?  Email him and tell him, “You know, I massively and overtly lied to you from there very start, but I still, I think you’re cute and want to meet you.”  Come on.  Really?  Do you really think he will want to meet you?

I have to say, within this variation, sometimes the woman tells me that she was trepidatious to post her photo online.  So what does she do?  She jeopardizes the safety a friend of hers.  I encounter this scenario more often in women in their 20s and 30s.  Perhaps they really aren’t quite ready to date yet and need to get more of a social footing securely under them first with casual friends socializing.  Save the internet dating until later.

Another variation on this is where the woman uses a photo of her friend, emails with an attractive man, flirts, exchanges phone numbers, arranges for a first date, shows up and WHAM!  You have got to be kidding me?  Where could this couple ever possibly work out?  What was she thinking?  Unfortunately, what it definitely demonstrates is that this is a woman who is not remotely available or ready for a real relationship.

There is another dating profile problem.  More often it is evidenced by men and for other reasons.  For that, come back tomorrow and more from my series about Integrity in Dating.

Happy Dating and Relationships,

April Braswell

Dating and Relationship Expert

As seen in Dating for Dummies, 3rd Edition

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April Braswell

April Braswell is internationally recognized as America's Midlife Dating and Relationship Mentor and the award winning expert columnist at DatingAdvice.com. Bringing over 40 years of Sales and Marketing expertise, April is a the trusted Small Business Consultant and Coach to Leading Executives and Emerging Leaders. Author of best seller, Get Swipe Right. April coaches marriage-minded men and women to find and attract love, your best life partner. Life Love Love relationship. Love after 40 and 50. Photos appear by licenses with iStock. All rights reserved.

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Comments

  1. This surely fits in the “what were they thinking?” category. How did they see this ever playing out in a positive way? But from what I hear it happens more often than you would expect! Great advice, April!
    Sonya Lenzo

  2. I have to laugh about fake dating profile photos. Why raise expectations with false internet dating photos. Lying in Dating Profile is ridiculous if a LTR is what your after. Online Dating Photos should be truthful, as should the remainder of the profile

  3. Hi April,

    After reading this article, I am going through a sitcom scenario in my head! The question that has to be asked is, if someone ( for whatever reason ) does not want to post their actual picture, what are some better options?

    Stay Extraordinary and Keep Doing Amazing Things, Neil
    Lifestyle Induced Dysbiosis Syndrome

  4. I know it would be a turn-off for me to think that the person I have been communicating with was not really who I was. Dishonesty from Day 1 is not cool.

    Dennis

  5. What are people thinking when they take someone else’s picture?? Don’t they know that they are first dating “online” but the goal is to meet in person?

  6. Simple case of fraud . They are not serious , just playing with people’s feelings . Not very pleasant human beings really .

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