Seeking Marriage? Date 3 Men at a Time Until You Two Choose Commitment for Long Term Love Relationship
If you’re a marriage minded single woman looking for marriage and a life long love relationship, it’s time to toss a bit of the sexual revolution out the window. Don’t think of dating as you’re needing to check things out under his hood by date 3. Instead, remember to keep your romantic options open and consider all contenders before agreeing to take yourself off-market and out of the dating playing field.
I will see it portrayed erroneously to modern women that she’s the one who should cut off her options because she’s allowed herself to develop feelings. “But I like him!” Really, when you’re open to love and looking for the good in people and what makes each man you go on dates with a unique and interesting man, it’s really easy to “like” someone. It’s also super easy even for women to start to love a man.
Do not let those feelings be your guide.
How he treats you and pursues you are your initial guideposts. Of course, you only pair off with, commit to, and marry a man you love. But let him fall in love with you first. Keep accepting dates from other men and dating multiple men, appreciating each and his uniqueness, like trying on all different styles of shoes and admiring them all before making your selection.
Let him first ask you to move into a committed relationship with him before you break off going on dates with other men.
When single ladies approach me for my Online Dating coaching wisdom at my Dating and Flirting Workshops, one of the first things I recommend to them is, “Lady, you need to date 3 men at a time until you get engaged.” Ladies, don’t stop dating other men and taking yourself “off market” from the Singles Scene prematurely. Don’t worry about what he’s doing. Keep strong in your self-knowledge that you are worthy of marriage, and remain firm in a feminine way, “I just don’t feel ready to make a commitment with you yet, Dontae. I hope you’ll understand I need a little more time to get to know you.” The emphasis is more for you to think of and utter than actually to emphasize with vocal intonation.
If
Wondering Who Pays On Dates? Should Guys Expect to Pay for the Date?
Should women after 40 and over 50 being expecting the man over 40 to pay for their date?
Dating Expert For Women Coaches: Keep On Dating 3 Single Men Until her
Because of our oxytocin driver, women need to date more than one man while we are sorting out whom we will marry. As women, we actually NEED to date 3 men at a time until you get engaged to work well with our physiology. By dating 3 guys, your hormones never over-attach to one man.
1 and oxytocin prompts us to obsession
2 and it’s simply an either/or situation
3 and it’s JUST RIGHT. You can keep some semblance of perspective. Some. We’re still girls and have emotional drives, ok? Once the hormones are running with us, even the most intelligent don’t keep a 100% clear and rational perspective.
Dating Coaching for Women After 40: How to Respond When Your Guy Asks to Get Exclusive With You
When your A list man asks you to be exclusive, and trust me ladies, he will be ah-askin! Don’t say YES to exclusivity right away. Were you to do so, he might get cocky, feel you’re a touch desperate and clingy, or he might feel smothered by your enthusiastic yes. So.. when he asks, wait. Tell him, “Mike, I’m flattered that you want to be exclusive with me and I feel good that you’re attracted to me enough that you want to pursue a relationship with me. But I need to think about it a little and see how I really feel. What do you think? Can I get back to on that?”
While you are contemplating his request, tell Mr B and Mr C that they are just great guys. You’ve really been enjoying dating them. But you just feel you need to see where this other relationship is going. Bless their hearts, naturally, they’ll be crushed. But, and I love this about me, they will appreciate your straightforwardness and probably kick themselves a little, and well they should, for not having been sufficiently aggressive themselves in their pursuit of your to be the on to GET you. Nice, n’est pas? Yes! You will also cement yourself in their minds as the OH-SO-VERY-Attractive-One-Who-Got-Away. You WANT to be in that spot in their brains, ladies. It enhances your romantic stature.
Dating Expert Warns Single Women Not to Take Themselves Off the Singles Market Prematurely
By so doing, you will have the option of allowing them back into your dating rotation should things NOT work out with Mr A List.
When you DO accept to be exclusive with Mr A List, say, “Michael, I’ve been considering your request to be exclusive with me, I feel I can try to see how it works out.” This communicates that he is essentially on a probationary period with you. So, yes, rather than now thinking erroneusly, Oh, I HAVE her and can slack off (thank you John Gray for explaining this so well about men!), he works even harder to please you to WIN you to him.
Ok, so this is one where I get some grief. Surprise. The men who usually don’t like that I do this, it’s because they want to be sharing intimacy with you without actually contemplating and agreeing to the serious possibility of marriage. Some will agree to exclusivity because they want to take me off the market, but at their convenience. So, even if you agree to intimacy exclusivity, of course, honor that, and continue to date other men, to meet them. One of them may prove to be a better fit with you, who will lead you and cherish you more than the man who is, bless his heart, only desiring you.
So, to meet a number of men, I am a strong proponent of Online Personals.
Now, don’t go join Match, and somewhere else all on the same day. You’ll get a GLUT and be overwhelmed. Rather, stagger things. Start at one dating site. Do that for about 6 wks. You will have met your initial WAVE and onslaught of men and had a marvelous time with the grad student from the local university from another country but where you JUST can’t see having a relationship, maybe have 1 or 2 whom interest you potentially a relationship…. And NOW is the time then to post a profile up at Match as well!
DO MIX IT!
HappyDating
April
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