One of the things the first wave of the Baby Boomer generations grasps about dating and relationships is that if you are a single unmarried boomer, then you need a circle of friends for support. Invariably when you are over 40 years old and certainly by the time that you are 5o and 60 something as both waves of the Baby Boomer generation are, stuff happens.
No longer is your life the stuff of when you were 20 and 30 something when you could rely not only on your own health being pretty much perfect. But also all the family and extended family relationships being perfect health. By the time we hit our 40s, invariably there are significant family illnesses, issues, accidents, and, sadly, yes, deaths. Maybe not by the time you are 50 years old, but certainly by the time you are 55 years old, you recognize this and just kinda go with the flow of life instead of taking it personally.
Today I spent most of my day at the hospital in Orange County in support of a friend. And when you are at the hospital, there is so much that the patients themselves are uttering which reveals their lives and relationships. One single man over the age of 57 years old, I learned way too much about his personal and medical life by simply sitting in the ICU. However, what I was left with was, start developing those extended family relationships years ago.
So many of the first wave of baby boomers who are single grasp that just because they are not married doesn’t mean they cannot develop wonderfully supportive relationships amongst their friends. In fact, being the generation from The Beatles who is “Getting By With a Little Help from My Friends,” they grasp that their friends can be a lifeline. Additionally, on the romantic front, all the ways in which you are caring with others, it is all karma. You cannot be a kind loving friend in one area of your life without it spilling over into your romantic life. Single men and women grasp that you are a genuinely caring human being. I cannot begin to tell you how attractive that is for a life partner relationship. Yes, being visually attractive and The Bedroom matter. However, ultimately, that chemical response in your brain is fleeting. I was talking with a friend who has been married over 25 years the other day at lunch. We agreed. At some point love ceases to be the “In Love” chemical addiction in our brain and we then choose to love someone. When you reach that point, you deepen your relationship skills and start to become a truly loving person. Because that then is your nature and your practice.
Many boomers are single and single again for various reasons, having never married, getting divorced, as well as all like myself who became widowed. Single boomers are creating more loving friendships to provide a range of support around them from their friends rather than only looking for it from a spouse or children. Those loving friendships skills cross over to the romantic relationship skills as well. The way in which you are a loving, caring, relationship committed human being caries over from your friendships to your romantic relationships as well.
And THAT is magnetically attractive to anyone who has been around the block a few times. They recognize lasting love skills. It is not always on the day when we are our most physically beautiful.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Jennifer Battaglino says
April 20, 2010 at 6:23 PMWhat a beautiful post and well said. Yes, you need to have physical attraction but that can grow or die depending on the person’s personality. The Baby Boomer generation has a lot to offer!
Jen Battaglino
The Harwood Group – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety
Dr. Wendy Schauer says
April 20, 2010 at 6:36 PMApril,
It’s so true…life really is all about relationships.
Thank you for sharing this.
Yours In Health!
Dr. Wendy
Michael D Walker says
April 20, 2010 at 7:13 PMSorry to hear you had to spend so much time at the hospital with your friend
but as you pointed out—it’s good that their surgery wasn’t of an emergency nature!
Michael
The Success Secrets
Shane Kester says
April 21, 2010 at 1:03 PMI can’t remember who said this but it sounds like sage advice to me.
“Beauty is temporary, but stupid is forever…”
Luckily my wife didn’t hear that one before she married me, now she’s stuck.
Shane Kester
Sabrina Peterson says
April 24, 2010 at 10:05 AMMost of the baby boomers I know who are single are perfectly happy having a supportive circle of friends, if they happen to find someone to date, love and commit to/marry then they feel it’s the icing on their cake. Unlike 20 somethings and plenty of 30 somethings who spend so much time trying to find someone to date and marry that they forget to enjoy themselves.
Sabrina Peterson, NASM CPT,CES
Corrective Exercise for Every Body
Steve Chambers says
April 24, 2010 at 12:13 PMPeople need to have relationships. We take these for granted when we are young because we are so busy and everyone loves us. When we’re old we end up with nothing.
Steve
Lisa McLellan says
April 24, 2010 at 1:42 PMI am a very loving caring friend. I only have a handful of close friends but I would put my life on the line for any one of them. My husband and I were best friends before we were married and even now. It is definitely important to have friendship as part of your relationship with your significant other.
Whenever I see old shows from the 50’s, I often notice that the husbands don’t treat their wives very well. My grandfather seemed to always be yelling when he “talked” to my grandmother. And in the movie Delores Claiborne, I couldn’t help but think “why did those two ever get married?” Friendship is important in any relationship.
Lisa McLellan
Babysitting Services, Nanny Services, and Nanny agencies
Cindy Edwards says
April 24, 2010 at 8:03 PMHi April, there’s truth to the essence of relationships here.
Sonya Lenzo says
April 24, 2010 at 8:39 PMSmart and caring Boomer age adults take the time to build those supportive networks before they need them.
Sonya Lenzo
Mark says
April 24, 2010 at 9:17 PMI have been very fortuante to a have maintained a strong, supportive and encouraging friendship with 3 friends since high school. Having that support group whether in a relationship or being single can make life so much more rewarding!
Mark
Direct Selling Advice, Leveraging Relationships for Long-term Profit
Scott Sylvan Bell says
April 24, 2010 at 10:40 PMHaving friends is hugely important no matter what the age is. As time goes on those friends can help in the time of need for support.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Juliette says
April 25, 2010 at 12:58 AMApril, great points and tips for baby boomers. thanks!
Tim Van Milligan says
April 25, 2010 at 5:11 AMSteve, I’m in the same boat as you. Thanks for making me crack up this morning.
Tim Van Milligan, helping you Make Money Online, God’s Way!
Daphnee says
April 26, 2010 at 2:51 PMHi April, I really enjoyed reading your dating tips for women like me.
Eileen O'Neill says
April 27, 2010 at 4:00 AMYour post is spot on! It’s so true that kind and loving relationships really count towards the people we live and work with ….
Eileen
Heffie says
May 3, 2010 at 4:16 PMHi April, your dating tips sound true with what works for me meeting more guys!
Jannae says
May 3, 2010 at 8:12 PMHi April, great dating tips for my group of friends.
Daphne says
May 6, 2010 at 9:29 AMApril, your dating tips are so practical. thank you. It’s true about making more friends and spending time with them.