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Expert Dating Tips for the 20 Somethings – Christian Dating Example

Expert Dating Tips for the 20 Somethings – Christian Dating Example

Many of the 30, 40 and 50 somethings singles think they are the only ones who are challenged to meet other great singles.  And yet, the 20 somethings have their own meeting and dating obstacles to deal with.  Once you are no longer in 4-year college, all of sudden it is no longer interwoven into your daily life activity meeting and socializing with your contemporaries, many of whom are single.


Now that you are out of college, pursuing your career and life, hey wait a minute, what happened?  Where are all the other great singles? Many young professionals are so busy with their jobs and spending 2-3 hours a day on the commute drive, that by the time they get home, if their roommate doesn’t have friends over visiting, they are simply too exhausted and challenged to meet other singles.  What are some hot dating tips to meet more 20 something singles?
Seeing as we are still in the Season of Easter, I will give a few examples for the Christian Singles to make it concrete.  However, any single can take the principle and apply the tips to their own unique situation and metropolitan area.

Christian Singles Groups and Christian Singles Ministry

A number of Christian Churches have some kind of singles group to minister to their single members.  However, you are, of course, limited to the singles who are actually members of your church.  Now, I have case study after case study of a husband and wife who met at church and married, and even those who are members of small churches.  However in general, to have a large enough group to provide some potential dating prospects, you need to attend a medium – large church.

What are some alternatives…

Christian Dating Tip #1:  20 Something Ministry

A number of churches have a ministry particular oriented to meet the taste, style, and needs of the 20 somethings.  These groups are often clustered under the age category rather than labeled as a Singles Ministry.  However, many 20 somethings are single, so you get what you are looking for in both cases.  Look to see if there are some services offered at non-traditional times where the music in contemporary or experimental.  Sometimes those services are offered on Saturday evening in a “Lab” style.  Other churches offer the alternative services on Sunday, Tuesday, or Wednesday night.

Christian Dating Tip #2: Visit and Participate in the Singles Groups of Another Church

You may feel a tad unfaithful to your own church doing this.  However, a number of the very small close-knit denominations like the Mennonites actually make it a normal practice to send their singles to another church in a different region.  Sort of like under the feudal system when pages apprenticed to different knights outside of their Lord’s realm, so singles would be sent out to a relative’s home for the summer to meet, mix, and mingle with other singles in that area.  Go ahead and search for churches in your area which offer singles activities.   Some churches offer 3 or 4 singles groups each clustered by an age range.  Do some searches for churches within about 10 miles or so of where you live.  Go to their websites and see what ministry groups they have and any calendar of events those groups have.

Christian Singles Ministry, Christian Singles Fellowship

Sometimes just hanging with fellow Christians is what a Christian Single Wants

Christian Dating Tip #3: Locate Activity Based Groups

Here in Orange County there are Christian Jogging and Running groups.  Not everyone who joins the group is a major jogger.  They just are willing.  And the group encourages a variety of running abilities.  Everyone knows where they start and where they meet up for coffee when you finish.

Additionally, there are Christian singles Hiking groups.  I have seen these both through googling on Christian Singles Groups and Christian Singles Ministries, and then clicking through the results to the descriptions.  Christians singles groups are Christian singles not always looking to date, but certainly wanting to meet and mingle with fellow Christian singles for when they are ready to court, date, and marry.  This is part of the metro-specific research I provide for my coaching clients.  When you are sufficiently self-motivated and self-implementing, you can do that for your own area.   Additionally, join Meetup dot Com and look for groups based on activities (hiking, jogging, surfing, skiing) and interests (Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist).  You will be surprised the breadth of groups you will find.

One of the benefits of joining and participating in the Activity Based Groups is you are simply casually and comfortably socializing.  There is no pressure to date the others in the group.  And you might be feeling that you’d prefer to become acquainted with your potential dates a bit before you make a date.  You get to see their lives, how they interact with others, their social skills, their communication skills, and personal their foibles (we all have them, right?).

Happy Dating and Relationships,

April Braswell

Christian Dating Expert

{ 17 comments… add one }
  • Michelle Mason April 6, 2010, 7:25 AM

    Wow! This article is for me. =-) Meeting people in your 20s is actually really hard. Most people do it in clubs and bars, but if you do not like that scene (like me, who is uncomfortable with the meat market feel), there aren’t a lot of options. And the other problem is that most of your friends are getting married, starting families, etc, and you suddenly find that your support group has different priorities than you. I have exactly one single friend left from high school and college.
    I have been tempted to try singles groups at other churches, since I seem to be the token single 20 something person at mine. But it was always a bit intimidating. Your blog has given me a bit more courage!


  • Lisa McLellan April 6, 2010, 8:02 AM

    I love the idea of activity groups. I heard an ad on the radio the other day for a company that just runs events for singles. They aren’t a dating service. They just do things like arrange white water rafting trips, horseback riding, skiing trips, bar hopping nights, shopping excursions, etc. Only singles allowed. I think this is a fabulous idea. I wish I thought of it.

    Lisa McLellan
    Babysitting Services, Nanny Services, and Nanny agencies

  • Mark April 6, 2010, 8:59 AM

    What great advice! I know plenty of young (20-something) Christians, in their 20’s, who are looking for that ‘someone’ special, but don’t want to do the ‘meat’ market approach at the clubs (like Michelle).

    I have one friend who joined a prayer group and has now meet up with others who have some of the same interest or convictions.

    One church here locally has been working at organizing at Christian Walk Your Dog day. Where singles can go out and meet up with others as they are walking their pets.

    I also recently heard of a local gym that has Christian Singles night, where singles can meet up with working out. April, keep up the great ideas!

    Direct Selling Advice, Tips, Skills & Techniques

  • Peggy Larson April 6, 2010, 1:57 PM

    Aha! I knew you’d have some advice for me to share with my twenty-something daughter!


    Peggy Larson

  • Jennifer Battaglino April 6, 2010, 5:49 PM

    I like the idea of going to other churches. If you’re not comfortable you could simply go to churches of the same faith but different towns. Regardless, the experience alone would be enriching and possibly open up so many new opportunitues, not just for relationships but also for your own growth.

    Great tips once again
    Jen Battaglino

    The Harwood Group – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety

  • Steve Chambers April 6, 2010, 7:43 PM

    These are some great options for the single person looking to meet Christian Singles. It’s important to develop arelationship with someone of like mind.

    Steve Chambers, Body Language Speaker

  • April Braswell April 6, 2010, 8:31 PM

    Hi Michelle,

    Thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting. I’m glad to hear of how what I covered in my dating advice and tips is helpful for you. Indeed, I have a section for the 20 somethings which you might find helpful: Millenials Dating

    Thanks for commenting!


  • Shane Kester April 6, 2010, 11:43 PM

    Those are very good ideas for meeting other singles. I utilised several of those ideas while I was at university. I noticed people that were terribly shy get involved in those kinds of social activities and got them out there and into the mix, it was invaluable to them.


  • Eileen O'Neill April 7, 2010, 3:34 AM

    Great advice especially about participating in group activity so you can see how a “prospective” partner is interacting with others – gives one a good insight into character and personality.

    Eileen O’Neill

  • Sabrina Peterson April 7, 2010, 6:48 AM


    I like your suggestion to visit other churches. Great idea!

    It seems to me that the younger Christian generation of a single congregation seem to hang out in large groups, while fun, there doesn’t seem to be any dating. My teenage kids and their friends at church might go to school dances together (like prom) but they don’t actively date each other.

    Sabrina Peterson, NASM CPT, CES
    Fat Burning Home Workouts

  • alam ghafoor April 8, 2010, 12:48 AM

    You hit the nail -on-the-head with that one April……briiliant.
    Churches of all denominations and differing faiths offer activities which present good opportunities for meeting other singles.It’s a great way and much better than the friday/saturday night option.You have more likelihood of meeting someone with thinking in common with you and if it is only faith well there could be no better foundation to build upon.

  • Darryl Pace April 21, 2010, 3:41 PM

    My brother-in-law’s brother met his future wife in a single’s group at church. They’re going to get married this May.

    Health, Fitness for Working People — Darryl Pace

  • Fong May 9, 2010, 4:02 PM

    Hi April. it’s true as I get older, my friends are more important to me as I age, cool tips

  • Gibson June 28, 2010, 4:49 AM

    Great dating advice, April. I think single peoplewho constantly are involved in group activity generally are happier people as well.

    Thanks for the great dating tips post.

  • Francie December 16, 2010, 7:19 PM

    This sounds like a fun way to meet other Christians when I’m not ready to get serious, yet…

  • Vanda Tao December 16, 2010, 8:18 PM

    April do you present these tips at churches for their Singles ministry or 20 somethings fellowship groups?

  • Katrecia Wilson March 20, 2011, 12:47 PM

    I do want to marry someday when it’s the Lord’s will. Until then, I just want to meet other Christians and read His Word. It’s just too early for me yet.

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