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Expert Dating Tips – First Date Tips for Guys

As a leading dating expert with perhaps the most unusual background (having been widowed), I get a lot of messages from single guys wanting dating advice on how to date women, how to ask girls out, and how to make a great first date.  Single guys want to know what to say and do to make the first date such a success that yes, their date wants to see them again.

What are some great first date tips for guys?

First Date Success Tip for Guys – Have a Plan

First, guys, have a plan.  Making a first date great really starts before the day of the actual date.  Making a first date with you a wonderful experience begins even before you ask the girl out on date.  When you ask her out, you didn’t just say, “Hey wanna get together some time?”  Instead, for successful dating, single girls and women really love it when the guy asks them out for date with a plan.

So, instead of a nebulous undefined asking her out, what positions you head and shoulders above the other singles guys is you ask her out for a specific date.  “I want to take you on date.  How is Saturday night at 7 o’clock?  We can grab a bit to eat before heading over to the salsa club for the class and dancing.”

See what I mean?  Now she has something to respond to.  The salsa dancing could be any activity which you two were chatting about or interest she expressed while you talking.

First Date Success Tip for Guys – Share an Activity

First dates and early dates in a romantic relationship, it is great if you can suggest and plan for a shared activity.  Having shared activity to pursue together gives you both safe topics for conversation.  You don’t need to share about your prior dating relationships.  Nor do you need to go into explanations and details about your divorce as well as more bonding occurs when you do an activity together.  You also are being gracious and giving her something she can casually talk with you about – the shared activity.  This way she doesn’t start to treat you like all of her girlfriends and do too much girl talk before you two know each other better.

First Date Success Tip for Guys – Keep It Brief

First dates are just about becoming a little bit better acquainted.  It is only in the Hollywood movies that they are half day gab fests.  Even if the rapport you two create is amazing, refrain from trying to elongate the first date to go past a few hours.  The gauge you want to use is to have the first date be 2-3 hours.  Yes, if you’re at a dance club it is ok that it becomes closer to 4 hours.  Afterall, you two are not chatting the entire 4 hours.  You are dancing with others periodically.  However, you want to leave enough mystery and interest to have a reason for a second date.  Keeping the first date short and fun helps you to win the right to ask her on a second date!

Special First Date Tip Note:  If this is a first meeting date from having met at an online dating site, then my recommendation is for a shorter date.

Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Dating and Relationship Expert

{ 16 comments… add one }
  • Rob Northrup April 20, 2010, 3:41 AM

    Amazing how often having a plan comes up in life as good advice.

    You are right, having a plan for a first date makes it much more likely to be fun and enjoyable, and therefore successful. As you say, this first date needs to offer the opportunity to get to know each other a little better and see whether there is a basis for the relationship to progress further. So, planning something that you don’t get trapped if things aren’t working out is also important.


  • Howard April 20, 2010, 4:13 AM

    Hi April, your first date tips for guys is very helpful. I grasped immediately and understand the essence for dating.

  • Michael D Walker April 20, 2010, 4:35 AM

    Excellent advice!
    I’ve found that asking with specific information on what you want to do on the date makes a world of difference because even if she doesn’t want to go to the event I was thinking of taking her to….she’s quite likely to counter offer with something she does want to do if she’s free that night.

    I also think you should use humor carefully here because some women are not amused when you ask them to go to the cat juggling class on Saturday night even if you offer to pay for their protective eye wear, wrist gauntlets & other safety equipment. 🙂

    The Success Secrets

  • Sonya Lenzo April 20, 2010, 4:48 AM

    You are right on here. Most guys don’t plan anything for a first date…they just plan on how to GET the date…
    very good advice!
    Sonya Lenzo

  • Tim Van Milligan April 20, 2010, 7:40 AM

    Thanks for the tips. The first date would be pretty critical, for both the man and the woman. Keeping it short lessens the chances of things going wrong.

    Tim Van Milligan. Helping you Make Money Online, God’s Way!

  • Robert Kaufer April 20, 2010, 8:14 AM

    Seems kind of intuitive but maybe not. This would make for a good first date.


    Robert Kaufer

  • Mark April 20, 2010, 11:01 AM

    April… I appreciate you dispelling the hollywood illusion where a budding new couple go on a date that seems to span a week in the film… very unrealistic and un-necessary! Keep it short, see if there is chemistry before investing too much time up front… if she is the right one… you will have your whole life to spend time together!

    Direct Selling Advice, Leveraging Relationships for Long-term Profit

  • Shane Kester April 21, 2010, 12:55 PM

    Excellent advise as usual. Where were you when I was in collage? Probably in college yourself…

    Shane Kester

  • Lisa McLellan April 24, 2010, 1:48 PM

    Great tips. I like the idea of leaving a little mystery. What fun would it be to go out again if you know the guy inside and out after the first date?

    And I love the “have a plan” suggestion. When I was (young and) dating, I hated when guys would ask me what I wanted to do. I know they were trying to be thoughtful, but I would’ve preferred them to have had it all planned out. At least if they didn’t want to totally take charge, a choice of two ideas would be much better than “what do you want to do?”
    The problem I had with it was mostly that I had no idea what the guy’s budget was. Did he have money on him for dinner and dancing or was he thinking more like pizza and a movie. Hopefully lots of single guys read your blog!

    Lisa McLellan
    Babysitting Services, Nanny Services, and Nanny agencies

  • Sabrina Peterson April 24, 2010, 10:46 PM

    This is good stuff April.

    Here’s my first date tip: DO NOT take your date to see a movie. And girls, DO NOT accept if the guy asks you to go to a movie on a first date.

    Sabrina Peterson, NASM CPT,CES
    Corrective Exercise for Every Body

  • Barbra Baxtor April 25, 2010, 8:25 AM

    Hi April, Would it be alright if I point to your dating blog, from my website? I’m wanting to source as many sources of info as I can to help singles like myself.

  • Jordan Trickel December 16, 2010, 7:05 PM

    I enjoy professionals that blog with great dating tips like this, April, it’s definitely really tough to receive that forms of knowledge just about every other way. Remarkable work. I appreciate your advice.

  • Daphne Sprole December 16, 2010, 7:56 PM

    I really love it when a man stands for me and opens the door me. Great first date behavior!

  • Mario C December 16, 2010, 11:09 PM

    April your dating tips for guys are great. Do we need to bring a gift for girls to like us?

  • Sharon March 19, 2011, 3:44 PM

    What about who pays? Should I be offering to split the bill and go dutch with guys?

  • Rob Dally March 28, 2011, 2:20 PM

    This would be so useful for other single men like me, too.

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