For the single folks who don’t have a date and it is Friday night and Saturday night – THE BIG DATE NIGHTS – are looming before you.
What are you to do if you don’t already have a date lined up?
You have to start building your dating pipeline NOW.
You have to start sowing some seed about MEETING new people.
Start getting in the WEEKLY habit of checking the CALENDARS and EVENTS section of your local newspaper. Now the thing is, what you need to focus on for most effectively meeting new people is not to go to your favorite rock group’s concert.
yeah
It’s fun.
However, you will have MINIMAL interaction time with OTHERS while you are there.
The better thing to do is to sign up for both social and business events newsetters. Like with SocialDomain.com. This is just an example. SocialDomain serves San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Washington, DC. So if you live outside of those areas, search out something SIMILAR for YOUR metro area.
Social Domain includes both events geared for singles and business events. Singles often overlook the importance of attending those smaller scale (under 50 people attending) technical and business events. These are often great places to meet others at a ratio that ensures you have time to connect warmly with frankly MOST of the people there.
Yes, it is business. Dress to impress (leave your Victoria’s Secret plunging neckline top for later, NOT tonight), ladies – skirt suits, gentlemen – YES, DO wear a suit or at least business casual WITH a sports jacket/navy blazer sort of look. Talk business, warmly, and then segue TACTFULLY to the personal
OK, this is IMPERATIVE.
LOOK FOR A WEDDING RING. (Left hand)
If no ring there, this LIKELY means the lady is single.
If no ring there on a MAN, not all married men wear a band. It was originally for MEN to read that a lady was OFF MARKET. He may work with his hands. whatever. Just tread TACTFULLY here.
IF NO RING and YOU ARE… innnnnnterested, then utter a sentence like this: “I’m really enjoying talking with you. You’re so easy to talk to. You’re so intelligent. How about we grab drinks at (the hotel bar at the networking event venue, the bar at the restaurant which is the venue, a wine bar around the corner from the networking event)?”
As you have drinks there, flirt A LITTLE. Give them a graceful OUT. At the end of 1 or 2 drinks (goal is to connect, not get drunk. goal: segue to a DATE), “I’ve really enjoyed talking with you. You’re so fascinating. You’re so intelligent. I enjoy the same books/politics/tv shows/dogs you talked about….”
If it is the WOMAN doing this: “… I’d really love it if you asked me out on a date. Here’s my personal card [personal cell number, not work number].” Close mouth. Smile sweetly. If he is interested, he will likely SAY SOMETHING RIGHT THEN.
If it is the MAN doing this: “…I’d love to take you out on a real date. Can I get your cell number, not just your work number?” Close mouth. Smile at her. WAIT. If you two have discovered a shared passion for pinto noir, fabulous to ask her on a Pinot Noir Wine Tasting event next Friday night. Otherwise, leave the DETAILS and AGENDA of the date for when you PHONE HER LATER. Maybe she voiced a delight with THAI food and you know this fabulous little place which grows their own Basil. OK to ask her directly to a THAI DINNER Saturday night when you meet her. OTHER THAN those obvious agenda dates, wait until you phone her to do that.
You want to do only one Call to Action at at time with her.
Right now, your goal is to GET HER PERSONAL NUMBER with her agreement that she is receptive to your asking her out on a date.
Do the ACTUAL ASKING HER ON A DATE later.
Happy Dating!
All the best,
April Braswell
Dating Expert and Online Dating Coach
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Sound advice: casual, friendly, no pressure. Most people that I have met are willing to chat, just looking for a non threatening opening. And a little observation goes a long way[ wedding ring finger]
Thanks
JC jc
April,
Hope you had a great Friday night…
Seize the Day,
Rob
Personal Asset Protection For Small Business Owners
Great advice. My Friday night date is my internet homework
mark glaciermarketing.wordpress.com
Hi April,
Thats awesome advice for both us guys and girls out there! I like the fact that you go into the psychology of the mind behind what you are doing as this is the driving force happening subliminally
Duane
Learn Winning Persuasion
Techniques that Work Like Magic by Tapping Into the Psychology of
the Mind with Persuasion Expert Duane Cunningham!
April,
Wow! That was a pretty detailed, step by step plan to get a date with someone. Great dating advice!
Health, Fitness — Darryl Pace
Hey April!
I always look forward to reading this blog.
I love this bit:
“Can I get your cell number, not just your work number?” Close mouth. Smile at her. WAIT.”
Don’t you love that feeling? When you’re both looking into each others’ eyes and suddenly all your communication is non-verbal.
It’s electric!
I love it April. You explain this stuff really really well.
I can’t wait for more.
JJ Jalopy
Life Coaching and Home Business Advice with JJ Jalopy
What great advice for singles! Your suggestions for comments etc. are superb! Some people just don’t know what to say at the right time and can blow a potentially good thing!
At what point when singles meet, do you suggest that they reveal they have children if this applies? One of my babysitting clients told me that she lets guys know in the first few sentences that she’s got kids in case they aren’t in to it.
Lisa McLellan, Child Care Expert – Babysitters, Nannies, and Au-pairs
April,
Can’t get lost with your step by step, painted by the numbers instructions.
One tricky bit:
>
LOOK FOR A WEDDING RING. (Left hand)
If no ring there, this LIKELY means the lady is single.
>
These days, we need to look out for those “MBAs” – “Married But Available”s!
So, apart from asking for the cell phone #, I suggest you ladies & gentlemen, get the birthdays (NOT birth date yet!) from your targets and use Pure Numerology to do a quick profiling to save your precious time from unfruitful rendezvous!
John Ho
Understanding Personalities for Better Influence & Persuasion
P.S. Now, to make sure I can learn from your consistent & tireless blending in, I use Post It to stick on the top RHS of my laptop to remind me to do the tie in.
Most people have no idea the detailed dance required to interact succesfully with the opposite sex. The world needs more of this.
Christian Haller
http://www.christianhalleronline.com
I dated my computer on Friday night along with a school play for my 11 year old.
Same old same old for an old man
Bob Kaufer
If you MOVE like the Tin Man, you will THINK like the Scarecrow and FEEL like the Lion
Great blog! Even for us old married folks it’s still important to have regular dates with our spouses. We may have to put that on hold a bit though for the next 9 weeks!
Pam
http://www.greatwealth.com
Friday night was law stuff for me
Boring
The DIY Lawyer
DIY Lawyer – Where you can learn to do your own estate planning
April,
You make it all sound so easy. Will have to give it a try.
-Pat
Business Owners Fast Track to Internet Profits
How about Sat. morning?
I look forward to all you post.
Lynn Lane
http://www.Warriorofsuccess.com
Cool tips April. I have a date with my pillow (seems it’s running late)… But have been doing some interesting networking at Millionaire Mind.
All the best,
Yann
http://www.ProfitsTactics.com
Dating, working, homework, sleeping, they are all correct, SOMeTHING has to give over the next 9 weeks.Guess we’ll have to save your tips to try after we are rich and famous…or at least out of this class!!!
SunnyMarie
Glamour and Glitz
http://www.sunnymarie.com
I hope you had some fun Friday night. Vegas is a fun town.
Steve
April,
My friends and I had a sure-fire way (or at least we thought it was) to determine if a guy was off the market. We checked to see if his socks matched! If they matched – he was likely taken. If not, he was in the game.
This worked pretty well until I met my husband, Rod. His socks actually matched! I was suspicious at first if he was truly single!
(which, lucky for me, he was! 
Great post!
Pam
Great Minds, Great Wealth: How to Raise your Return, Reduce your Risk, Cut your Cost
Love these dating tips, April!!!
David
Wonderfull reminder April to keep things safe and meet new people.
Couldnt agree more with that, very attractive point to meet singles all around us.
Yeah, April. It’s true. Seems that on the weekend I get into a rut and haven’t been dating for some time. Good suggestion. Thank you for the kind push.
Is there a place other than singles bars where a guy could meet beautiful girls on a Friday night?