One of the things the first wave of the Baby Boomer generations grasps about dating and relationships is that if you are a single unmarried boomer, then you need a circle of friends for support. Invariably when you are over 40 years old and certainly by the time that you are 5o and 60 something as both waves of the Baby Boomer generation are, stuff happens.
No longer is your life the stuff of when you were 20 and 30 something when you could rely not only on your own health being pretty much perfect. But also all the family and extended family relationships being perfect health. By the time we hit our 40s, invariably there are significant family illnesses, issues, accidents, and, sadly, yes, deaths. Maybe not by the time you are 50 years old, but certainly by the time you are 55 years old, you recognize this and just kinda go with the flow of life instead of taking it personally.
Today I spent most of my day at the hospital in Orange County in support of a friend. And when you are at the hospital, there is so much that the patients themselves are uttering which reveals their lives and relationships. One single man over the age of 57 years old, I learned way too much about his personal and medical life by simply sitting in the ICU. However, what I was left with was, start developing those extended family relationships years ago.
So many of the first wave of baby boomers who are single grasp that just because they are not married doesn’t mean they cannot develop wonderfully supportive relationships amongst their friends. In fact, being the generation from The Beatles who is “Getting By With a Little Help from My Friends,” they grasp that their friends can be a lifeline. Additionally, on the romantic front, all the ways in which you are caring with others, it is all karma. You cannot be a kind loving friend in one area of your life without it spilling over into your romantic life. Single men and women grasp that you are a genuinely caring human being. I cannot begin to tell you how attractive that is for a life partner relationship. Yes, being visually attractive and The Bedroom matter. However, ultimately, that chemical response in your brain is fleeting. I was talking with a friend who has been married over 25 years the other day at lunch. We agreed. At some point love ceases to be the “In Love” chemical addiction in our brain and we then choose to love someone. When you reach that point, you deepen your relationship skills and start to become a truly loving person. Because that then is your nature and your practice.
Many boomers are single and single again for various reasons, having never married, getting divorced, as well as all like myself who became widowed. Single boomers are creating more loving friendships to provide a range of support around them from their friends rather than only looking for it from a spouse or children. Those loving friendships skills cross over to the romantic relationship skills as well. The way in which you are a loving, caring, relationship committed human being caries over from your friendships to your romantic relationships as well.
And THAT is magnetically attractive to anyone who has been around the block a few times. They recognize lasting love skills. It is not always on the day when we are our most physically beautiful.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
Dating and Relationship Expert